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Asian Fathers Know Best

As you might imagine, I didn’t get into much trouble as a kid. I was your typical, happy-go-lucky, dorky, goody-two-shoes. But there were a couple of instances that stand out from my childhood where I really got into trouble, and they are probably not typical of the average kid:

  1. Not practicing piano. I remember clearly that day we were eating hamburgers from McDonald’s at home around a living room table, and my father asked if I had practiced piano that day, and I had said no. (I should have lied.) He literally threw the fry down mid-dip into ketchup, and started yelling about how I shouuld be practicing every day and what else was I doing while they were paying for lessons?
  2. I was carrying a box/basket filled with various sewing things, and it somehow slipped and I dropped it on the floor and all the contents fell out and scattered everywhere. Yelling ensued about how clumsy I was and how was I ever going to find a husband?

That has actually been the first response to a lot of things when I got into trouble. Apparently, a lot of my behavior, like being clumsy, was a deterrent for guys looking for a potential lifelong mate.

Also filed under major reasons I would be single forever if I continued this behavior: sitting on the couch too hard, not making sure I had very soft skin, shaking my leg while sitting.

After accepting my engagement to Dan when he first sought permission from my parents, one of the first things my father told me was to immediately learn how to cook, sew (who sews nowadays anyway?), and to call my in-laws at least once a week. I should really start a whole separate post about things my dad says. Like “Shit My Dad Says” but “Shit My Asian Dad Says”.

This includes, can he wear a top hat to my wedding, can’t he pay someone at msft to give Dan a job, and of course, did I have sweet dreams (asked the morning after my wedding day) ? <awkward turtle>

On that note, have you seen “High Expectations Asian Father”? Hilarious: http://highexpectationsasianfather.tumblr.com/

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